Half measures have availed us nothing

One year ago today I noticed my weight had jumped up to a startling 272.4lbs

I set out two simple goals;

A) lose 53lbs, putting me below 220.

B) run a 5k race

Well, looking back, how did I do?  Not great. Today I weigh 264.4 lbs, so in one year I lost only 8 lbs. I participated in a 5k race, but by no means did I run it.

What happened to my year? I could list some excuses easily, injury, kids, time constraints.

But they are excuses. What's the real truth?

Half measures avail us nothing

That's the cold hard truth. I'm not trying to lose 10lbs to fit into a smaller pair of jeans. I'm trying to reverse years of neglect on my body. And I spent a year doing it half-assed.

Honest appraisal, I have more than 60lbs to lose. That's not to look better, that's simply to be healthy. Say what you want about BMI, but I need to lose 40lbs to not be classified as obese!
These are big numbers, these aren't "I'm going to cut down on my pasta" numbers, these are my life needs an overhaul numbers.

I would eat right, then not
I would log my food, sometimes
I would workout, when I felt like it

Half measures avail us nothing

This cannot continue.  I cannot simply do the few easy things and expect a true change. I cannot simply hope things will get better while eating a cheeseburger. I cannot become more fit by averaging one workout a week.

So lets turn it around. Let's fix it. Now.

Goals for 2012

Goal #1: Get below 205 lbs.  Once I am at that weight I'll take an appraisal of what a reasonable goal weight should be for me

Goal #2: RUN a 5k. Not walk, not half and half. Run. The whole way. This one might be harder than the weight loss.

Half measures avail us nothing

I'm not going to get there without changing how I do things. I can't occasionally log my food. I can't occasionally workout, and I can't occasionally blog about it.

Logging food is how I hold myself accountable for my choices, it has to be a daily thing.

Working out is good for my waistline, my heart, and for easing stress, 6 times a week is not unreasonable.

Blogging is my accountability to friends and family, my way of sharing my struggle, and hoping others are motivated to join me. I need to aim for weekly, but at least every 2 weeks I need to be in here, good or bad.

When I achieved successes during 2011 I did the above. When I stumbled in 2011 I did them occasionally.

Half measures avail us nothing.

No half measures for 2012. This is my year, this is my 40th year, this is the year I meet the fitman again.

@fatfitman

Ho Ho Ho its off to run we go!

Well Ho Ho Ho everyone, the fatfitman stuck by his promise and ran in the Burlington 5k Santa run last weekend

 As you can see from the photos there were a lot of very dedicated people (4000 participants!) out in the morning chill to raise some money and do something healthy this holiday season

 That's me below in the pointy hat, sadly at my current weight I make a pretty good Santa, hopefully at the run next year the outfit will look a little more baggy!

 4000 Santas make a pretty big sea of red as we head out down Lakeshore Blvd.

 The fatfitman, my darling wife (left) our friend LC (right) and our two biggest fans who braved the cold to meet us at the end.

So how was the first 5k? Well, honestly, not as bad as I thought it might be. I finished in 43:03.9, which is not god by any means, but it's a start. More importantly I enjoyed it. I want to do more runs, and the competitive side of me wants to get better at it.

I think that's one of the things I have to key on going forward. I am a competitive person, I love my hockey, karate, and now the idea of running in a competition. I can only get better at each of these as I lose weight, and increase my fitness level. It takes hard work and dedication to to these things and to do them well.

The holidays have been predictably hard, my struggles with eating not helped by a week on the road in Atlanta, but those are just excuses. Self-improvement is hard, and I need to focus on what drives me to get better instead of focusing on what tastes good.

My family drives me, my competitive nature drives me, my desire is fueled by these things. I will improve, I will get healthy, I will lose more weight.

What fuels you, what drives you, what are you looking to change and improve as the year comes to a close?

Next entry will be the one year anniversary of the blog, an update on my status and my goals for the coming year.

Gotta walk before you can run

Ah tis the eating season, and for those of us who are addicted to food every day is a challenge.
The last two weeks have seen piles of my favourite foods, sweets and drinks placed in front of me, and so far so good, I remain around the 260lb mark.

I realized in the last few days that trying to lose weight at this time of year is setting myself up for disappointment, and with me disappointment leads to more eating. So, to stave off this dreaded cycle i am trying something different. I am focusing on not gaining weight, and maintaining my workout schedule despite the busy days ahead.

So far so good, this morning 260.8lbs, and a few days now until my next challenging evening event, so I shouldn't have any trouble eating healthy between now and the weekend.

Ah, and on the weekend, something new!

HO HO HO, that's what I'll be yelling as I participate this weekend in the Burlington 5K Santa run. For those of you not familiar with it, every year a few thousand people dress in full Santa suits and run 5K through the streets of Burlington ON. This year myself, my wife, and our good friend LC have decided to participate.

My frequent readers will know that i am not at a running weight yet, and the last time I tried to run at this size led to a back injury and several months away from training, so with that lesson learned I will be walking the course. This is hard for me, as I am by nature highly competitive, but I know if I keep this up I can start running more seriously come the spring time. If I overdo it now, I'll only disrupt my long term goals.

So get out this holiday season, enjoy yourselves, keep staying healthy when you can, don't overdo it when you can't. And if you are in Burlington this Saturday, I'll see you at the finish line!!

HO HO HO

@fatfitman

And now the hard part

So, 2 weeks ago, 265lbs

This morning 260lbs.

Gotta say I am pretty happy about that. Worked out more days than not in the last 2 weeks, ate better (though not perfect) and ultimately am rewarded with 5lbs of weight loss.

Last time I saw the sub-260lb me was earlier this year, and not long before I found ways to short circuit myself. Hopefully this time I can say goodbye to the 260lb me forever.

What's to stop me?  The holidays.

Every dieters nightmare, the holidays bring with it turkey, stuffing, chocolates, wine, candied yams, mashed potatoes made with cream, more wine,  snack foods, appetizers.

And that's just the food.

Parties, drinks with neighbours, office lunches, festive specials.

And that's just the events,

Shopping, crazy malls, food courts, what to buy, interminable lines, out of stock, in-laws coming over, every weekend booked from now til January.

Basically, it is 6 weeks of high-stress, surrounded by the food that got me (and many of you) into trouble in the first place.

So how do we get past it? Well, first acknowledge it's going to be hard, be ready for it. I won't be expecting 2lbs a week out of myself over the next few weeks. I do however expect to continue losing. With that in mind this is the time to be especially vigilant on all those days you don't have an event.this is not the time of year for a quick trip to Wendy's, or for some extra little weekday treat. This is when 90% of your meals have to be very healthy options. Balanced, filling, healthy meals, because the other 10% are going to be trouble.

As for that other 10%, well, a few tips. Avoid loading up on breads, enjoy the main courses, avoid the appetizers. At parties, stay away from those easy snacks that seem to keep filling your mouth while you chat with friends. Watch how much you are drinking, switch to water when you can. Be very mindful of EVERYTHING you put in your mouth this month, don't mindlessly snack.

Lastly, but importantly, exercise. It's a busy time of year, but this is when you have to say "My health comes first" find the time to work out. Morning, after shopping, before bed, just get moving. Find ways to sneak in extra burn, don't fight for the close parking space at the mall, park in the far reaches and enjoy the walk. the exercise will help with all the extras we are bombarded with, and its a great way to bleed off some of the stress.

It's this time of year where we face the most challenges, re-focus, put in that effort, and make this a truly happy, and guilt-free holiday season.

I'll see you all at the malls. I'll be in parking lot Z, Row 30, right next to the abandoned shopping cart.

@fatfitman

Long time away, where has the fatfitman been?

Ever find it hard to own up to something? Made a mistake and now you're stuck trying to hide from it. Even if the hiding is pointless, if everyone around you can see the mistake, or if the hiding itself is a dead giveaway that you've screwed up.

That's me since April 28th.

So what happened? Well, let's take it in turn.

5K run - Didn't happen, I injured my back in April and it curtailed my running plans to nothing. On doctors advice I stopped my running training until I lost some more weight (more on that in a minute).

So, my running is down, ok, what do you do when your plans go awry? You pick yourself up and you try something else. So I did, I attacked the P90X program and tried to make that my major exercise plan.

And then I injured my wrist. Couldn't bend my right hand for a few months.

So that's 2 strikes. How do I recover, I pick myself up again and find a way, I lower my calorie counts, I find some way to keep moving.

Boy I wish I could say I did that.

Nope

I ate, and ate, and ate some more. I got lazy, I stopped trying, I stopped blogging, I stopped believing.

I just plain stopped.

I quit.

And so here we are, November 8th. Almost 11 months from my start at 272 lbs, and I am 265.

It's so easy to get down, so easy to say forget it. So easy to look at the holidays coming, the challenges I faced and just give up until January. 

But I am not going to do that. Missing my goals is bad, giving up entirely would be far worse.

I can't change what happened April to November, I can't change that I stopped, I can't change that I hid from it (and from all of you), I can't change that it was the wrong thing to do.

But I can change what I do today, and tomorrow, and from here on.

Change with me, come back to the blog, come back to your own challenges, change what's nagging you.

You'll be happier for it.

fatfitman

Follow me on Twitter @fatfitman

Challenges Challenges

What a frustrating week.

My exercise is up, my calorie intake is down, my diet is balanced. My wife is working out with me and as motivated as I am.

Sounds good right?

My weight is the same, my back is so sore I can't run, I'm basically not moving and it's driving me nuts!

I know, I know, stick with it, it's a bump, a bounce, a plateau. I get it. Just frustrating. I hate not seeing results on the scale, so I have to look for them elsewhere.

I found them...The other day doing my P90X routine I was able to do some of the ab workouts that had stymied me before. It's a small thing, but it points to changes in my body, in my core strength. My abdomen is measurably smaller than it was a few months ago. Both good indicators it's working.

But the best news was during a doctor's visit. My blood pressure has come down. Substantially actually. That was VERY encouraging.

We can get so focused on a goal, especially with weight loss, that when the goal is elusive we miss all the things that are also changing for the better. If I was strictly looking at the scale I would be pretty depressed and angry about this week. but I'm not. I'm not jumping for joy either, but I am revelling in the small things this week as I fight through this little weight burp.

It's a challenging journey, and that's ok. It's good to push ourselves, it's good to set lofty goals. And it's also good to appreciate achievements outside those goals, to keep motivation and fire burning inside as we go through some of the hard parts.

Speaking of challenges. On the weekend we had a family party. My cousin is leaving for Scotland, and her mother, my aunt, turned 50.

My Aunt has always enjoyed athletic pursuits, tennis, golf, softball. She was a natural athlete when she was younger, and continues to be even now. When I was a kid, I looked up to her for her athleticism. I went to her softball games at night, loved watching this little spark plug play. She was a very positive role model.

I know she reads this blog, and has enjoyed my writings. So, here is my shoutout to her, and my challenge. In this your 50th year, pick a goal for yourself, tell us what it is, stick to it for the year, enter year 51 better than you entered year 50. turn that competitive fire and energy you have into something hugely positive for you. Whatever it is, health, fitness level, improving your golf handicap, volunteering at something. But pick something, use the 25 year olds energy you have to accomplish something at 50 you can look back at and be proud of, continue being that great role model for your daughters, your nephews and nieces, and add to it being a role model for living young at an age when so many people say it's too late to change.

Good luck

@fatfitman

Motivation in 140 Characters or less, thanks @BL11Austin

Journeys of change are hard. Ask anyone who is on one or try one yourself and you'll see. If you know someone who has quit smoking, lost weight, kicked a bad habit, gone back to school, well, then you know someone who has challenged themselves and come out better for it. But take a second to appreciate just how hard a trip it was.

It's never an easy trip, and there are lots of pitfalls along the way. Lots of reasons to just go back to what is comfortable. Lot's of reasons to simply live in the now instead of being focused on your future.

And sometimes we need a little help, and sometimes it comes from surprising sources.

Earlier this week I posted a blog quoting Austin from The Biggest Loser. When I sent out a tweet tagging Austin I immediately got a response from him encouraging me. But that's not where the story ends.

The next day was hard, really hard. I didn't want to work out. I wanted to eat about half a tub of ice cream and just feel better for a minute. Then I took a quick look at my blog, I noticed that my last entry had 10X the amount of traffic I normally get. But I didn't know from where. I logged into twitter and discovered to my great joy that Austin had tweeted a link to my blog to his followers, and all these eyes had come over to read my story.

All these people, many in the same boat as me, reading about my struggles, my achievements, my journey.

And a funny thing happened. My motivation went through the roof. My next entry couldn't be about a failure. I couldn't let myself down and have to share that with everyone.

Austin, this young 20-something from California had, in under 140 characters, got me off a couch and out the door for a run.  The ice cream forgotten, a healthy snack in its place. My journey uninterrupted. The struggles of the last 6 weeks erased, I wake up this morning back to 258.6, those extra pounds shed and me ready to continue.

I know weight loss, and any self-help goal has to be motivated by your own desire to change, it has to be a little bit selfish. But sometimes we all need some help. Sometimes it's a friend with a kind word. Sometimes its a family member with nothing more than a look. Sometimes it's a quote, an image, a TV show that gets us moving.

And sometimes its a stranger, a young man, tweeting from California, who gets us going again.

Thanks Austin,  I needed that.

Fatfitman

Checking back in

So 11 days ago I vowed to start working on that 5k run.

I'm happy to say I've been sticking with the Couch to 5K training plan so far. Yesterday I completed run #2 of the second training week. 5 min warmup then 90 seconds of running followed by 2 minutes of walking for 6 cycles (21 minutes) then another 5 min cooldown.

I'm also proud to say that my DW (darling wife) has taken up running with renewed passion. I say renewed because back before I met her she was an avid runner, 10Ks, half-marathons etc. But after she finished law school she stopped. Well, she seems to have the bug again and looks forward to her training days far more than I do!

It felt good to have some success again, its been a solid 6 weeks it seems of going backwards. Sometimes the early success we have can make us complacent. I know it worked that way for me. I stopped logging food, I stopped working out with the same regularity. I lost that first 10lbs easy. I should have known it would get tougher, I should have known it was the discipline I was showing that was leading to my success.

I want to thank @bl11austin for a tweet on Apr 16th. He quoted Jim Rohn "Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment"

Don't ever forget that my friends. Goals are great, goals can drive us, goals make us reach for more. But discipline is required to achieve them. Without discipline goals are just empty promises to ourselves.

Don't go backwards

A very good friend of mine (JL) said something once I have always loved. "Let the bridges I burn light my way"  Though he wasn't exactly making the point I am, the sentiment is the same. Don't go back the way you came, don't even allow yourself the option. Always move forward and create situations where moving forward is the only choice.

I mentioned in my last blog I needed to change my workouts because of an injury (which by the way I will be seeing a specialist about in July). So since one of my goals this year is to run in a 5K race, I figured i would start my training for that.

but how do I get myself out and doing it? Well, the easiest way to stop saying "I'll start tomorrow" was to force myself into a situation where tomorrow wasn't an option. I registered for the 5K race that is held in concert with the Mississauga Marathon. The 5K is held May14th. That's a mere 5 1/2 weeks away. That leaves me about the bare minimum amount of time to go from couch potato to struggling runner. I do not expect to be able to run the course by then, but I do expect to be able to run most of it. If you want to see a handy program for going from couch to run click here.

So last night was my first crack at the distance, finished in 43:59. Mostly a brisk walk, but for the first 20 minutes I alternated running and walking as per the program above. My neighbourhood is very quiet, beautiful and a little spooky in the dark I discovered.

The main thing is i know have a goal, an immediate one, one I can't ignore and delay and say I have lots of time for. I've committed to this run, I've left myself no option to slack off in the training. For the next 6 weeks it's all about getting ready for that day. Moving forward, one step at a time. I have my plan, my route is laid out, all I have to do is execute it.

I'll keep you up to date on the progress.  What's your goal, and what are you doing to get yourself there?

3 Months in..An Overdue Update

So where have I been?

Stalled and stalling.

I did not want to write this blog. See, blogging is easy when you're doing well, it's a chance to motivate others and celebrate your own successes at the same time.

But what if you haven't been succeeding? what if you've been failing...Miserably? What if a diet health blogger yesterday saw they gained 4 pounds over the last month or so and decided to celebrate that misery by having an ice cream cone and a slice of pizza?

How do you put your failures out there right alongside your successes?

Well, something like I just did I suppose.

I mentioned previously that I had suffered a training injury. For those who have been asking, the injury has not healed, in fact it has become worse. this has stopped me from continuing my P90X training, at least for now anyway.

Stopping the workouts is not an excuse for weight gain, anyone serious about a journey to a healthy weight knows that the number one thing that makes an impact is what you eat, not what you burn. But stopping the workouts had an unexpected effect on me. It broke my routine, it sapped my motivation. It made me stop thinking about the penalty of bad choices because I just went back to all my habits before the changes.

This can't continue. I still need to be below 220lbs before Dec 31st (minimum) I made a commitment, to my readers, to my family, and, most importantly, to myself.

So, step one, admit I screwed up. Say it aloud, get it out there. Be accountable for it (thanks JB). Blog about it. the blog and knowing people are reading it is immensely motivating for me. I should have been on here a bunch, I wouldn't have slipped as far.

Step two, make adjustments. Watch the input of food, watch it closely. Find a new exercise routine until my wrist is healthy. Looks like I'll start prepping for the 5K a little earlier than I had planned.

Step three, keep it up. Do it today, then tomorrow. Small good decisions, made consistently, until I'm back in the pattern again.

Back on my feet folks, off the coach and away from the nachos. Hope you'll continue to join me.

Fatfitman

Not all pain is gain

So chaos has reigned around my place recently. We've been battling sick kids, a leaky basement, a collapsing pool liner, and our own illnesses. Quite a 2 weeks.

To top it off I suffered a training injury about a week ago that has just been getting progressively worse. As a result I cannot do most of my strength building exercises, so my P90X routines have come to a crashing halt until my wrist heals. I can still do excerpts from them, but not the full workouts.

To top it all off my treadmill broke and now I need to have a service call on it.

I am in an excuse-rich environment. I could easily just back it in and say "it's not my fault". however, i didn't.

what i did do was pay even closer attention to what I could do. I watched my calories. i watched my choices about portions, types of food, putting myself in vulnerable situations. I reached out to my support network for help a few times.

So this morning, the leak is fixed, the kids are getting better, the service guy is coming for the treadmill soon, and hopefully by the weekend I can start moving and burning more. But, the real question I had was, how did I do through these trials?

So I stepped on the scale.

258.8

WHAT?????

258.8

I broke through that damned 260lb mark. Put it behind me..Forever.... I'm not going back over that number ever again in my life. I haven't been under 260 since probably last summer, and despite all that went on the last few weeks, I managed to find a way to slay the 260lb Guy and now am looking forward.

I feel energized, I feel proud, I feel like I overcame obstacles that would have sent me scurrying for a Burger King Whopper in the past.

Don't let your obstacles lead you to excuses. Find a way around, over or through them. You might be amazed at what you are capable of when you stop believing that you can't do something, or that something is too hard.

The sweetest victories are the ones we are surprised by, fight those tough battles my friends, the rewards are worth it!

NOTE:  I received a note from a follower asking for help. When she makes Kraft Dinner at home she almost always eats the whole box, invariably feeling guilty and a little ill afterwards. She wanted to know how to avoid that.  Well, besides not cooking it (or having it in the house to start with) I would suggest the following. As soon as it's ready, take the pot, walk over to your trash and throw half of it away. Don't wait until you taste it and start to be seduced by the processed cheesy salty goodness. If you must have it, force yourself to limit it by getting rid of half before you even start.

If anyone has any other questions I'll try to answer them in future entries. 

Nothing happens in a straight line

I'm just back from 2 weeks on the road. The first week was for business in Cleveland. More on that later. The second trip was 10 days in Florida with my family. To save on airfare we drove down.

In a straight line it is 1184 miles from Toronto to Fort Myers, FL. By car it is 1520 miles. 340 miles, 20% of the trip is zig zagging your way down the highways, 340 extra miles because it's not a straight line drive. We have to go around obstacles like hills, lakes, valleys.

Weight loss is similar. I'm not just going to go and drop 50 straight pounds...I wish. I'm going to have good days and bad, good weeks and bad. I'll get to my goal, but I'll have travelled a lot further than 50lbs to get there.

On January 30th I announced I had lost that first 10lbs. well, a few weeks on the road has proved to be a detour. I now weigh 263.8.

I could get all depressed here, and quit the process. I could say, well, it's bad, so I'll start tomorrow and have a nice grilled cheese and bacon sandwich for lunch. but just like driving to Florida, i want to get there. I don't want any more detours than I have to make. So the bodymedia armband is back on, I have an exercise date with my wife tonight, and we start pushing deeper into the process.

Some people have been asking me how I managed on the road with food and exercise.  Well, it is HARD!!! Driving along seeing nothing but McDonald's, Cracker barrel, KFC...All poor choices. Subway was my salvation. Turkey subs, light or no mayo, lots of veggies, water to drink. healthy snacks in the car, made before we set out by my wife. Planning a little, waiting until we saw a Subway saved untold calories.

During the business trip it was even worse. At least in Florida we were staying at my parents house allowing us to cook. While in Cleveland I had to really watch what happens in the restaurants. Salad appetizers, dressings on the side, choosing small beef dishes (careful with chicken, many restaurants saute, or sometimes even presoak the chicken in butter!), went out for fish one night.

I was less successful with the exercise, in Cleveland I should have done much more, in Florida lots of walking.

All in all 2lbs or so gained after 17days on the road is not terrible. It's a detour. I didn't go too far out of my way, and I am ready for the next leg of the journey. I have to push hard these next few miles to make up some lost time, but overall...I'm still on course.  How about you? Still on that good track?

How do you fit it in?

Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business. - Montgomery Burns

He could just as easily have been talking about fitness it seems.  Probably the number thing I am hearing from friends and family is where do you find the time to work out every day? I won't lie to you, it's tough. Two toddlers, a career, new house. It's a challenge when it's 9pm, all I want to do is sit down on the couch with my wife and watch TV.

But everyone does that, and the latest data shows we're all getting progressively bigger and more out of shape. And I've always done that, sat in front of the TV. And I've gotten progressively bigger and more out of shape. My favourite definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting a different result. How can I expect to get healthier, how can I expect to achieve my goals if I just sit here.

So last night my DW (darling wife) and I went downstairs after the kids were in bed and worked out together. I have to give her special credit here, last night was a resistance workout, she is not a fan of these, but she stuck to it and worked hard. She's also promised to join me tonight for the Yoga DVD. I always look so awkward compared to her doing Yoga, but I'll be doing it nonetheless.

When you have a goal, a dream, a journey, never forget you can't get there by standing still. You can't rise above the masses by simply doing what everyone else is doing. You have to put in that extra effort. you have to do the things others are not. You have to find it within yourself to stand up, get away from the couch, away from the TV, away from your comfort zone and start putting in the work to get to your goal. Unlike what Monty Burns said at the start of this blog you do not have to sacrifice those around you, you can find ways to make them part of it. I challenge all of my readers to do something tonight that moves you a step closer to your goal. If you are serious about your own goals you'll find the time.

It's worth it.

Mind Willing Body Screaming

I'm drenched in sweat, my arms ache, It's 1030 Sunday night and I have just collapsed at the end of my second set of diamond pushups. My basement floor is very comfortable. Nice and cool, lost of space to writhe in agony.

I started P90x last night. There are 3 variations of the program, classic, cardio and doubles. Lets forget doubles. Its for the heavy duty fitness junkies with loads of time. The classic variation is a bit more resistance training oriented than Cardio, although both programs have elements of the other.

The first classic routine is Chest and Back. The best way to work those muscles are push ups and pull ups. Different variations of each, with some weight training mixed in. 12 exercises in all, 2 sets. Push ups and pull ups eh? ok, I did Basic once, how hard could this be?

Did I mention I did basic 17 years ago? And that I haven't done true exercise in a while? I completed the program, perhaps setting new lows in P90X history for reps. Pull ups are a special level of hell. Overhand, under hand, wide, narrow, all the different variations, but ultimately pull ups are about one thing, Strength to Weight ratio. Let's see, I weigh 262lbs, and have the upper body strength of a small child. Total Pull ups - 0.

But here is where I like this program, in every routine is a demonstration of a modified version to be used when you are starting out. Use a chair under your foot and push with one leg to assist you doing pull ups, or do your push ups on your knees. All designed to make this program inclusive.

I had to work hard, It was late when I finished, but I did finish. Heart rate nicely elevated the whole time, and according to my bodymedia device I burned about 590 calories that hour.

One of the catch phrases you hear a lot of on the videos is just press play. Don't worry about how many reps, don't worry if you can't keep up, just be here, show up, try. I think that's a lesson for all of us, no matter what we are doing. We can choose to be intimidated, to believe we can't do something, do shy away when we can't do something well. Or, we can press play, we can try, we can approach with the attitude , its not that I can't do it, it's that I currently struggle with it, but I am here, I am going to try, and I am not going to quit.

Don't quit

Press Play

Go do whats hard if it's going to lead to a better you

Tonight: Plyometrics

An Object at rest

Well, my first month is over and it's time to see how I've done so far. The good news is I am down 10.4 lbs!  I was thrilled this morning to see that number. 262lbs is still way too big, but a 10lb loss is a great start in one month. With my goal  being 50lbs (minimum) this year, it feels great to be early in the year and 20% of the way there.

I want for a moment to thank my wife for her support in the first part of this trip. It's been very challenging moving and trying to do this, and her help has been huge. Also a number of my friends for your encouraging words and support. Especially JL who took the time to break down some numbers for me on what I had done to that point, then used those to motivate me when I was a little low. It is awesome to have the support level I have had in this journey so far

But weight loss was only part of this journey. The other part was my fitness level. I can lose all the weight I want, if I am still not feeling athletic then I have only gone part of the distance. So, it's time for phase two. Start moving big guy, and moving hard!

I have exercised on and off for years, treadmills, elliptical, free weights, machines, even yoga (try it guys, it's a MUCH harder workout than you think!) The problem was, I would get lost in the sea of suggested workouts, what to do today, how much weight to lift, etc etc.

About 6 months ago one of my co-workers mentioned he was doing the P90X routines. Now this co-worker, JB, is in fantastic shape. When we go on the road he is up at o-dark-thirty for his first workout and then goes back to the hotel after work for an hour workout before dinner. He's a machine, and I am a bean bag, but the program was fascinating. The guess work over what exercise to do is handled  by the videos. 90 days of workouts, each day planned for you, all the workouts a manageable 1hour in length. Targeting different muscles, even different goals. Some days are cardio based, others strength, some flexibility, its all laid out. I tried a week a while back and really enjoyed it, but lacked the dedication to see it through.

I don't lack the dedication any more, I've shed those first 10lbs. Now its time to really bring it. The first DVD will go in tonight. The idea is 90 straight days (1 day off every 7) but I'll have to modify it a bit, life happens. But my rules will be no consecutive days off. If I must miss a day, I MUST do the next day.

Some starting numbers (these are almost as sad as my weight, but this blog is about openness and accountability)

Day 1
Weight 262
Chest 43in
Waist 45in
Hips 43.5in
Maximum push ups: 18
Heart rate after 2 min of jumping jacks: 170bpm
1min later:146

I have other numbers you record at the start of P90x, but those are the key ones. We'll check in on those after the first 30 workouts and see how I am doing.

Thanks again to everyone for the help so far. Stay with me, share your journey, and good luck with your goals!

Back to it

Distractions Distractions......Truthfully? Excuses excuses. And I am good at excuses. Really good..Especially to myself.

Since last blog I have moved houses, had some sick kids, travelled for business, and been sick myself. Now, some would say it is reasonable to take some time off from a quest during these times. That it is unreasonable to try to exercise, diet, make healthy food choices, and maintain a blog when life is so busy. I fell into these "reasons" in the last 2 weeks.

Here's the problem though. Like a person trying to quit smoking, or an alcoholic trying to quit drinking, I cannot simply "let up for a day". 1 day becomes 2, becomes 4 becomes a fortnight.  And in no time, unchecked, the old habits come back, the weight comes back. The motivation for change subsides, the accountability evaporates.

I can't let that happen. I have to make this healthy life a priority. It has to be above excuse, beyond reproach.

While I was away on business I had 5 mealtimes. Of those 5 I made exactly 1 good choice. bad odds..I had several hours in the evening to myself and the only thing I exercised was my remote control hand.

Can't do that and succeed. No matter what your endeavour, letting up for a couple of weeks puts you in a hole. You have to find a way to maintain the momentum. For me it's blogging, its watching The Biggest Loser, it's stepping on the scale and taking stock of where I am.

I was very lucky the last two weeks. Moving is hard work, and the exercise was helping me to keep losing weight while my food choices slipped.

So no more excuses, no more 2 week vacations from the effort. I'm making good progress. I need to keep driving forward. This is a year long journey, and like a job, you only get so many weeks off if you want to be successful. Those were my two weeks.

Think about you and the challenges you face on your own journey. Have you taken a few days off from your goal? Days that were counter-productive to what you were trying to achieve? Did you feel better or worse for the time off? I know my answer.

Goals, achievements and keeping up the battle

One of the tricks I learned in previous battles with weight is to be constantly setting goals for yourself. Try not to get too bogged down by the big picture of your overall weight loss. It can be so disheartening. Look at the people on The Biggest Loser, how daunting is it for them to think, I have to lose 100, 200, 300 lbs. You lose 5 lbs,  and think, I still have to lose 95, 195, 295? No... You've lost 5lbs! That's an achievement!

5lbs, relate it to something tangible. 5lbs is a bag of oranges. Would you want to carry around a bag of oranges all day? I don't. That gets heavy after a while. Well, you've lost that 5lbs, one less bag of oranges you're carrying. 10lbs? now you aren't carrying around a sack of potatoes. Starts to feel pretty good doesn't it? Before you know it, these 5 and 10 lbs add up, and you're getting closer and closer to your goal.

Since Dec 29th I have lost 6lbs. Not a bad start. Sure I still have a long way to go, but I can't get to my 2011 goal of 50lb without losing that first 6. That 260lb guy in the future is getting closer, can't wait to see the last of him.

Six pounds is a good start, and it wasn't easy. I had some tough days in there. Yesterday was one of them. We're in the middle of moving, and our house is in turmoil as a result. It's hard to plan for healthy options when you are trying to empty the fridge. Days are packed with, well, packing, and suddenly you can find yourself making excuses for a easy snack or meal. Yesterday saw me eating a couple of lindt chocolates, some of my kids french fries, an one or two other indulgences. In the past I would have said forget it, I'll start again tomorrow. But rather than get down on myself over that little lapse, I picked myself up, ate healthy the rest of the day, and planned healthy choices for today.

When you fall down in your journey, whatever that is, don't sit there feeling sorry for yourself, don't kneel there mad that you fell, and ready to quit. Pick yourself up, look forward at your goal, not back at your stumble and keep moving towards that goal. We all fall down, we all take that little side trail off our journey. What separates successful people from those by the wayside is how fast you get back on track. How quickly you can recover from that challenge.

This move will be over in a few more days, then I can start on phase two, which involves dramatically increasing my exercise routine. I hope you'll keep following along.

Feel free to share with me your own journey, your own goals, and your own challenges. And if you can think of people that would benefit from reading this, feel free to share it with them. Let's all move forward toward who we want to be, let's do it together my friends!

Temptations, turning 39 and the Biggest Loser

Turned 39 today...A good chance to reflect on my 30's and think about all that changed for me. Interesting to note, I turned 30, weighed 268lbs, got separated, changed careers, moved back home, got divorced, lost weight (210!), met new girl, got engaged, got married, gained weight(240), shattered right leg, lost weight(220) changed careers, had first child, gained weight (250), had second child, turned 39 weighing..268lbs!

Seems a bit like a treadmill, but I'll tell you honestly, despite the fact my weight is the same, there is not one part of my life that is not better now than it was 10 years ago. I am thrilled with my life, maybe not with my weight and wellness, but with a great family, a supportive wife, a good job, now is the time I can concentrate on the changes I need to make.

Birthdays bring new temptations, I want my big steak dinner tonight, but I think I'll get some light thai food instead. My wife and daughter thoughtfully made a low-fat cake for me, and I'll be very mindful of the portions.

My big present? A night at a Toronto Maple Leaf hockey game. Tomorrow night in fact. Stadiums and I are not good from an eating perspective, so I'm going out to dinner before the game to better regulate my options, and hopefully come through the next couple of days with my weight unscathed.

The Biggest loser season 11 started last night. I love watching this show for the motivation and, honestly, the cautionary example. Two things stood out for me. One was a contestant who spoke of watching the show for years and always judging the people on it for their weight issues. He was very emotional when he took the scale and had to admit he was one of them. It is a lesson to us all that we should be mindful of how we perceive others, how we judge them, how we react to them. It is a slippery slope from us to them sometimes, and a real wakeup call when you hit the bottom of that slope.

The second thing that stood out was a contestant that commented how most people guess his weight wrong, he weighs over 400lbs, most people guess him around 300. This happens to a lot of us who are overweight. When I announced I was doing this, and said my starting weight was 272.4, people were stunned. Most had me 230-240. I tell people who don't know my weight I want to lose 50lbs, just to start, and they think I am nuts, that it is too much.

We can be deceived by these attitudes, we can allow those around us who tell us its ok, that we aren't "that" big, that we don't need to lose "that" much, we can allow them  to shape our self-image and change it to a false one. We can say things about having a "real" body, that we like our curves, our love handles, our booty. I liked being the big guy. But it was false. All lies. Step on a scale, get a body fat analysis, try and run 1 mile. See if you are really where you think you are, where you want to be.

No, we don't all need to look like cover models, but we need to be honest with ourselves, we need friends to be honest with us, and us with them. If you can honestly look at yourself, and be perfectly happy, I congratulate you, don't lose that, do what you have to do to maintain it and be a model for others.

If, like me, you can't do that, then make this the day that the self-deception ends. Don't wait, start today, do it now, make the changes. Say goodbye to that person in the mirror and don't look back.

The Holiday Gorge

Ever wonder why so many people make New Years resolutions to lose weight?  Think about what you ate for the last few weeks...Is your belt a little tighter? Your jeans a touch snugger than you remember?

A friend of mine asked me when I started this blog and overall health project, "why didn't you wait until New Years?".  Good question. The first part of the answer is I stepped on a scale, saw my weight and was stunned. The second part is I knew what would happen over the last few days of the year if I didn't start right away. If I had procrastinated I would have put myself in a deeper hole. I knew I had to start making better choices right away, or end up at an even higher starting weight, an even longer road ahead of me.

Look at what we eat in the 8 day food orgy of Dec 25 to Jan 1...turkey, gravy, ham, potatoes, candied yams, prime rib, we drink bottles of wine, champagne, egg nog, lots of alcohol. Even our snacking takes on new levels. How many chocolates over the last month? I lost count. My favourite are Turtles, the pecan, caramel and chocolate cluster synonymous with Christmas. One Turtle is 80 calories. That's actually reasonable for a special little snack...However, how often have you had ONE turtle...If you have that kind of self control you probably have little interest in the blog of someone trying to lose weight!  I don't eat one Turtle, I eat 3 or 4. Now we're talking almost 400 calories, or 20% of the total calories that is considered reasonable for one day.

I made  my choice on December 29th to change things. If I hadn't I know that on New Years eve that instead of a reasonable portion of the dinner my wife made, I would have eaten until I was stuffed. I would have had 2 helpings of desert (I had none). I drank champagne, I had some wine, but I tried to balance that with good choices around my portions, my snacking, my sweets...My goal for Dec 29th to Jan 2 was not to make my journey any worse...I started at 272.4lbs. Its the morning of Jan 2nd, and I have lost 2.6 lbs, and hopefully said goodbye for ever to the 270lb me.

Next up, the 260lb me....He's a little ways away, but the fit guy is coming for him, and his days are numbered.