I have overeaten most of my life. Multiple helpings of meals, meal-size snacks, 2 dinners, 2 breakfasts, lunches that went on and on. I was always the guy you could count on to order the most food, and eat whatever was left at the table. I'd also be the guy going to town on the appetizers before all that even started.
As I mentioned before it has been over 110 days since my last big binge. And today I noticed something.
Something very strange.
I am full.
I don't remember the last time I felt like this. Normally I am a pretty bottomless pit, food goes in, and the feeding doesn't stop. But today is different.
After 111 days of not abusing myself with food, of normal eating, I suddenly am aware of having eaten enough (or truthfully, maybe a little too much)
I made ribs and my wife made pasta as a dinner tonight for my visiting parents. No snack appetizers, one glass of wine.
I had a quarter rack of ribs and a helping of pasta, then had a little bit more pasta (my wife is an amazing cook)
Suddenly I realized I was uncomfortable, a strange heavy sensation in my stomach. It was a long old memory to recall what is was.
As much damage as I have done with overeating, and my lack of physical activity, as difficult as this journey has been getting my food under control, and raising the bar on my fitness, this is a watershed moment.
Suddenly recovery seems so much closer.
I may pay on the scale for tonight, I don't know yet, but I have reached a breakthrough you need to have battled the demons of food to understand.
My body is remembering what full feels like.
My body is telling me it's had enough
My body is sending a message it hasn't sent in a very long time. Stop eating, that's enough, anymore food would not be pleasant.
If this seems mundane to you, I envy you, though you may battle weight, you may never battle food. If this sounds like something you can relate to however, you understand my joy.
Suddenly recovery seems so much closer, because my body is remembering what normal is.
It's taken over 110 days, but it's worth it.
Off to my rowing machine, lets keep these good days rolling
Saturday, August 31, 2013
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