Day 42..An Inspiration and a mad fatfitman

First and foremost I want to say congratulations to the entire @trainersonsite Tough Mudder Team.

This team trained hard, worked together, and conquered a grueling 17 km, 21 obstacle course. I could not have been prouder to have acted as their photographer all day, and try to provide some encouragement along the way.

It was incredibly inspirational to watch my wife, my friends, and all the competitors work to overcome the challenges. Old, and young, fit and injured, they persevered. At the end of the day, Rob handed out his own Trainersonsite medals to everyone, including me.

I couldn't accept it.

I didn't earn it.

While they were battling the obstacles and elements, I was fighting a battle of my own. This was the first time that being this out of shape had actually kept me from doing something I desperately wanted to do. No matter my size or condition I've played golf, hockey, tennis or participated at karate. I haven't been as good as I could have been if I was fitter, but I never had to say "No, I can't do that"

Yesterday, I had to say it. And it pissed me off.

It hurts, deep down it hurts a lot. I love the outdoors, I love this kind of activity. This race and it's ilk are the kind of thing I lived for when I was fit. To watch these amazing people and photograph their remarkable day was incredibly painful.

I've had a very unfocused week. Haven't worked out as much as I should, eaten a bit sloppy, gained a small amount of weight. But yesterday brought that focus back. Now I'm mad. Mad and very very focused

I don't like the sidelines. I'm a participant. Next year I am one of these guys.

Again, congrats to my wife, my friends and the entire team who finished. You guys kicked ass. You're my Monday motivators. I hope you're back there next year, so I can truly join you.